It's a social gathering. Some people you know, some you don't. Conversations range from recent cold-water boat diving adventures to future warm-water trips to dive gear to training programs to boats. Something for everyone, diver and non-diver alike. Just as you think these are some of the most intelligent people you've ever met, an unusual conversation catches your attention. "Sure, I can wear my floater coat. My friend's got an old steel tank I can use. No, I don't need flippers. Oh yeah, I went diving once...tried it twenty years ago in the Caribbean. Sure, see ya Saturday."

Now, you're really intrigued. As you join in this conversation, you discover this individual is planning to get some air (hopefully the need for a hydrostatic test and the lack of a c-card will halt that), wear a floater coat in lieu of a wet or dry suit and a buoyancy compensator, take an old double -hose regulator off the basement wall (yes, it just keeps getting better), jump into a marina with limited visibility and known current to check out a pal's boat bottom and "help" him fix it up. Why'd they want to do that? Saves all that cost of taking the boat out of the water, ya know.

As an experienced diver with some commercial experience behind you, you find yourself offering, no charge, to do this dive for someone you hardly know to avoid what will either become an unnecessary search and rescue operation or the funniest near diving experience this century.

In-water boat maintenance can be done safely and simply. However, there are a few important standards to consider. Let's see if you agree with these steps. Have you ever done this type of diving before? Most light vessel maintenance such as cleaning the boat bottom, replacing zincs, inspecting the hull for damage, removing line from the shaft and propeller, etc., can be done on well-serviced recreational scuba equipment with which you are familiar. Any task in the water will require your full attention. This is not the place to dive with equipment requiring repair. No place is. Wearing full scuba, including fins and a hood, will allow you the control to successfully complete these tasks. Why a hood when near the surface? Well, have you ever bumped your head against a propeller? Enough said.

How is the visibility? Good visibility is a relative term. Anything beyond a foot or two will do for this type of close inspection task. Are you comfortable in that? Is there a current? If yes, you will need to make a choice depending on whether or not the boat can be moved to an area of less current, and possibly better visibility, or are you comfortable using a safety line handled by a safety diver on the dock? And, there's another good question, do you have someone competent to serve as your topside safety? This individual is invaluable at assisting with gear, taking notes for you, shagging tools, and keeping track of the next task. Have you placed lanyards on the tools you intend to take in the water with you? A lanyard for even a simple task avoids the loss of wrenches, allan keys, etc. that can be time consuming and expensive to replace. If you disagree, then you have never dropped a tool into the silty eroded ooze common to many marinas. Often several feet deep, tools become swallowed up without a trace. Also, it's a good idea to clean your tools thoroughly as soon as you're able. A little penetrating oil goes a long way to maintaining functional tools even after limited exposure to salt water. Finally, have you considered how to get out of the water once the task is done? Not all boats have ladders. Not all docks are low to the water's edge.

Although this is not an exhaustive list, hopefully it gives you cause to pause and think before offering your diving services to complete in-water boat maintenance. Many tasks can be safely and quickly completed in water at far less expense than having a boat removed from the water. However, some tasks are best accomplished on dry land. You be the judge. And the guy from the party? The boat was hauled out a few days later and everything got thoroughly checked. Too bad, it might have looked good on a funniest videos show. Just kidding.